I had a baby dream last night. In the dream, I had to take the sprite, who in the dream had become a real live baby girl, to daycare while I went off to work. After a long hard day in the trenches, I returned home, put my feet up on the couch, and watched TV. Tra-la-la. Put on my PJs, brushed my teeth, went to bed, slept soundly. La-de-da. And then there came the moment in the dream, when I realized I had totally forgotten to pick up the baby! I just left her there, the way I've some times left my cats at the vet overnight.
I woke up completely ashamed of myself, and feeling very much like a bad mother. Doesn't bode well, does it? Let's hope I'm just a wee bit more responsible than that if I ever get the chance to actually meet this baby.
I once had a professor who lived in an upstairs apt above a front of stores. After her son was born, she just skipped right out to the store nearby like she was so accustomed to doing before, completely forgetting about him. He was napping, no biggie, but she was appalled - yet probably one of the best mothers I've ever known. As with a lot of motherhood, no harm, no foul.
Posted by: Cricket | January 25, 2005 at 01:19 PM
I have had lots of those types of dreams, too. Usually, in mine, I leave the kid on a picnic table at the park after lunching or at the store in a cart, or some other similar place. At least in your dream you leave the kid in the care of responsible adults. I'm the terrible one!
Posted by: dish | January 25, 2005 at 01:53 PM
Now you know you're definitely pregnant! Everyone I know who's given birth to or adopted a baby has been plagued by those "foprgetting the baby" dreams. Since I've been pregnant this second time, mine have changed. I don't dream about forgetting a baby--I dream about forgetting my toddler. It's funny how your subconscious tries to work out your anxieties while you're asleep, isn't it?
Posted by: Moxie | January 25, 2005 at 08:50 PM
Honey, your leaking breasts will remind you.
Posted by: eM | January 26, 2005 at 03:46 AM
I tend to have those dreams during pregnancy. The mind trying to work out scenarios which tend to be frigtening.
I meant to respond to you yesterday about testing. I had an amnio and have to say that I am really glad that I did. I know that everything is fine, at least chromosonally. It is a commonly held fallacy that those who have amnios are doing so because they would terminate if there's a problem. That's just false, another broad brush trying to make us out to be bad mothers.
I had an amnio because I wanted to know. I wanted to be able to choose, and it doesn't mean that my choice is automatically terminate. It means that I want to prepare, to read, join support groups, whatever it takes if there's a problem.
My best friend had a baby in May who has Down's syndrome. She was only 30, and had normal AFP and ultrasound results. She was told in the recovery room after her c-section. While she was in the hospital recovering for the next few days, she was going through all sorts of emotions while completely hormonal and unable to access any of the usual types of information. I would look things up and read them to her.
Because of this, I knew that I would want to be informed ahead of time. And I knew that I couldn't trust the normal test results.
This is a very personal decision that only you and your husband can make, I just wanted to hear from another pregnant infertile who did choose testing for just another opinion on the matter.
I loved the ultrasound picture yesterday. Take care of your little sprite.
Posted by: pazel | January 26, 2005 at 09:36 AM