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October 11, 2004



So beautiful Lobster girl - you and that Lemonade daughter would be a very pretty sight. Wishing you many more dreams of firefly moments, chirping crickets and a very precious DH. x x x x x x x (lots of smooches for you)


I'm so sorry about the negative, friend. I hope your nice, normal period brings with it a nice, friendly new cycle.

Thank you for this beautiful post. Love, J


I'm so sorry.

barren mare

Damn. I am sorry about the no- when you deserve a world full of yes. I like to think that all good things are coming your way- and it seems to me that you can see it too, shimmering in the distance- however you get there.


What amazing thoughts. I loved this post. I'm sorry to hear of the negative...but the positive and "worst-case" that you came up with - are so wonderful. I like your outlook. Might copy it for my own life!!


Lobster Girl,

I'm so sorry about the negative beta.

I approach life from the worst case scenario too and like you, once I figure out what my fear is and find a solution for it, i.e., knowing I can survive it, life isn't so scary anymore.

What a beautiful image of you and your daughter, what a beautiful image. Yes, you will be a mother and I hope soon.

Sending lots of love your way.


Will you forgive me if before I say how sorry I am, I say "Wow!"
OK: Wow.
I am so sorry about the beta.
What a beautiful, powerful vision you had. I'm sort of the same way - at some point it became clear to me that I was going to have a child in my life, not matter what, and suddenly the worst case scenario shifted. Because not having a child was not an option. It helped to understand that wherever the child came from was not as much of an issue as it had been before.
I am so sorry for the pain you are going through, but after reading your post I know you're going to be OK. I just wish you were spared more of this pain.


From one worst case scenario girl to another, your worst case sounds pretty darn good.

Sorry about the negative.

Oh, and I so feel your pain about that first year of grad school. Sucks, doesn't it?


Yes, yes, and more yes. This is what I saw. A beautiful girl from China. And I agree--if this is the worst case scenerio--then hey, it's a pretty okay thing overall, more than okay. I'm struggling myself with all of this, as you know, and although I'm farther along medical treatment wise than you, and adoption wise, I still have those moments frequently where I need to pull that image down and remember that that is my worst case scenerio. I'm so sorry about your bfn--you know how sorry I am--but I know how good it must feel to know that if, IF things don't work out with pregnancy, that little girl is waiting for you.

Love, Karen


the negative beta nurse - what a career... I used to think (when I was getting my negative beta call about every other month) that it must be the wrost job, to make those calls. I'm really sorry to hear you had to get one. I just linked here from getupgrrl's blog and I always feel compelled to post when someone writes such a heartfelt adoption comment. Something like that happened to me when we were waiting for our first (failed) IVF cycle - I saw my little boy from Korea so clearly... We did adopt, and now he's almost in kindergarten, and our life is so gorgeous in a way I once thought was impossible.

I wish you the very best of luck in becoming a mom.

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